Why best performance leadership starts with belonging
I never felt like I belonged at my first job, and I hated it.
I was always trying to fit in. And the more I tried and mimicked those around me, the worse I performed. The company expected conformity; it was made very clear that I could not succeed just being myself. And so I put all my energy into fitting in. I was crushed.
Belonging is a deep human need – one that doesn’t turn off when we’re at work. It means feeling truly valued and truly accepted. And it changes the way we feel about ourselves. When we’re free of those expectations – to conform a particular way, to perform a particular way – we can unlock our potential. It’s as simple as this: when we belong, we’re happy. When we’re happy, we work our best. It’s not about pushing ourselves harder, it’s about expressing ourselves more. That’s where best performance lives.
Belonging starts with trust. A trust that’s given in the first instance rather than waiting for it to be earned. Of course it grows over time, but it’s worth investing up-front, because implicit trust is the difference between teams that function adequately and teams that function exceptionally. When we trust, we admit we’re human. We gain the courage to experiment and push things forward, to speak out and feel heard.
We also need purpose – and it can’t just be about making money. Belonging requires a higher purpose, articulated by leadership and understood by everyone. Why are we here and what do we do? What impact do we want to make? It means knowing our individual purpose – our role and capabilities and value, and those of our teammates, too. We share a sense of ownership, and we’re moving towards a future vision together.
Too often, people see their colleagues as competitors. Our colleagues should be our comrades. When they achieve success, we should be thinking, ‘They’ve done something great, we’re moving forward because of it, I’m genuinely happy.’ But that kind of thinking only comes with a sense of belonging. It’s well articulated in the Zulu philosophy ubuntu, which translates to “I am because we are.” Nelson Mandela talked about this a lot. You succeed because the group succeeds. What’s good for the group is good for the individual.
This is what belonging looks like. But how do we get there? Structurally, there’s got to be change. Where diversity, equity and inclusion are not just spoken about but done. It’s in the people you employ, it’s in the way you reward and acknowledge, it’s in the continuous training you do, it’s in the events you celebrate and cultures you embrace. It always starts at the top, and it always starts with listening. It’s having conversations with people and letting them know – through praise, through recognition – how the business connects to them and they connect to the business.
“You belong here, I can’t wait to see you succeed.”
These can be difficult and complex and ongoing things to work through, but sometimes it’s as easy as saying it out loud. I know whenever I do an induction with a new employee, when they’ve learnt about what we do and where our department fits in, I ask them a couple of personal questions and at the end of it, I say: “Welcome to the team, just know that you belong here. You’re in a place where you’re going to be celebrated for your talents and what you bring to work every day.” To see the change on a person’s face when you say that to them is just incredible, and it’s the start of something great. “Hey, you belong here. You know that. I can’t wait to see you succeed.”